Thank you, everyone, for your positive comments and support for my writing! Today I’m posting an excerpt from A Thousand Kisses. At this point in the novel, Hélène has just returned to her hometown, Châlons-sur-Marne, for one last visit before leaving France to seek her fortune as a governess in Saint-Pétersbourg. As an unmarried woman, she needed to ask for permission to travel from the step-father who had molested her and forever changed the course of her life. Little did she know in 1910 that this was the last time she would see her family before she died in England eight years later.
Here is the excerpt:
‘The next day, Hélène went to the office of the Mayor for the letter of recommendation she would need to present to a potential employer: “This certifies that Mademoiselle Aubry, Hélène Adrienne, born in 1889, daughter of M. Aubry, Emile, and Mme Aubry, Charlotte, lived in Châlons from her childhood until 1907, and during this time, did nothing to cause any concern.” Well, thought Hélène wryly, if it was known I’d had a child out of wedlock, there might be cause for concern, but, clearly, that juicy gossip had not reached the Municipal office. The document was duly signed and stamped by the Mayor himself and looked very official.
As distasteful as it was, Hélène also needed a letter from her step-father granting her permission to travel outside of France. She resolutely knocked on M. Collard’s study door, her heart pounding, her throat constricted.
“Sir, I, I respectfully request a letter of permission to travel. I will need it to cross the frontier into Russia.” Her voice sounded infuriatingly small and child-like. She took a deep breath and resolved to stand firm.
“Ah, Hélène, yes, no need to be so formal to your papa. Come back to my study tomorrow and I will provide it for you. How are you – generally?” He waved his hand in a sweeping motion as if to account for the last two years.
“I have been managing, Sir, as best as can be expected.” She decided to plunge forward. “And, if it wouldn’t be too much trouble, would you be able to give me a loan of 100 francs to take care of my expenses until I receive a placement in Saint-Pétersbourg?”
“Hélène, that is quite a sum. Let me see what I can do.” He looked surprised at her boldness.
“It’s the least you can do, Sir.” She decided to look him straight in the eye, wondering where she was finding the strength to confront him so brazenly.
He was the first to look down, his fingers fumbling with the gold pen on his desktop. “I will go to the bank first thing in the morning,” he said in a low voice.
Her cheeks burning, Hélène walked away from his study, stopping to lean against the wall just outside the door to catch her breath. She had intended to ask for only 50 francs, she realized with a little smile on her face, but a moment of recklessness had overtaken her. She further shocked herself with the realization that she had no intention of repaying the 100 francs if she managed to extract them from her step-father the next day.
A few days later, Hélène was leaning out the window as the train slowly left the Châlons-sur-Marne station, vigorously waving her white linen handkerchief up and down and enthusiastically blowing kisses, even as she watched her sisters and their equally enthusiastic smiles grow smaller and smaller in the distance. Her smile faded as she kept waving to dear Blanche and Gaby; she watched as they stopped waving, turned around and started talking with each other while they walked away, seeming to have forgotten her already.
Hélène felt a sharp pang of loss, but pictured their faces, full of amazement and, yes, maybe a little envy, as they read the postcards she would send from Russia, and happily thought of the exotic gifts she would present to them when she returned home.’